Stop questioning your worth!

When is the last time you felt emotionally safe, like truly emotionally safe to share your thoughts and feelings. We are born with an innate desire to feel seen and heard. Our whole lives we are in relationships whether we realise it or not, we are always in relationship, we are born into relationship, we are damaged/hurt in relationship and we are also healed through relationship.

The relationship we have with ourselves and that is our thoughts about ourselves, how we feel about ourselves, whether we have our own back or not, especially during times of challenge, what we perceive we do or don't deserve. All of this is learned by us as children and it is only as adults that we have the actual capacity and by that I mean the actual biological brain development that is normal for humans, that allows us to actually look at all of those things and question whether they are helpful or true for us or not, and if not, find a more helpful way to think or feel that supports better relationship with ourselves and others moving forward.

The reason this is so critical is because the relationship with ourselves, the patterns of thinking and behaviour, and the way we view the world, ourselves, and others we apply to all other areas of our life. Now we could possibly have been taught to have some exceptions and so there might be occasions where one area of our life looks different to another area of our life and more often than not this shows up in how we treat others as opposed to how we treat ourselves.

This difference usually stems from being taught as children that other people's wants and needs are more important, or that other people are actually more important than what we are and that's a core belief that quite frankly far too many of us have and act out throughout our whole lives. Especially because the truth of it is, we are all equally important every single one of us.  No one is more or less important than anybody else, no one is more or less worthy, more or less valuable, more or less anything. When we treat ourselves or anyone else as less important, we damage the relationship and that includes the one with ourselves when we treat ourselves as less important.

It doesn't matter if a person has more money, if they have a bigger property, nicer furniture, a more expensive car, are more well known, that changes nothing about their importance as a human being, it means nothing about their value. I cannot emphasise that enough, it is so important to separate the person from the possessions and achievement. 

No, I'm not saying their achievements or the fact that they have more money means nothing obviously they have created a product or service or done something that other people or businesses have decided to pay money for, that's wonderful, but it doesn’t make that person more important or valuable than another person, they are just a person who has taken action and created a result that is desirable and viewable to others.

We don’t need to prove we are worthy; we never question the value of a baby, do we ask a dog to prove their value, no, do we ask other people to prove their worth, no, the question is not even asked because it is never questioned.  Stop questioning your worth, your value, it is unquantifiable, and just is, questioning it is unhelpful.

Alright my friends, thanks for reading, and have a great week. If you would like to learn more, I would love for you to visit my website www.pampoole.co.nz